Thursday, June 3, 2010

The Non-Zappy Happy Update

"I promise I'll be a good girl from now on."
{Does this look like da face of a little girl that would lie? bouts ya'll answer that amongst yourselves.}

I do declares, I thinks I opened a can of worms yesterday with my shock collar news. I’m sorry, I hopes ya'll was all able to sleep last nite and not too worried bout my future.  My mum has always been against those collars but da pawrents were a little concerned about my safety and afraid da neighbors would take matters into their own hands, if you know what I mean. They haves been to da house wanting to know what I talk about allday. And da collar was simply sumptin they was looking into, nuttin was set in stone. But please oh please, don’t be mad at my mum (you can be mad at Mr. Dad though).Hers just wouldn’t be able to handle somebuddy being upset at hers (yep, hers paid me to say that). Anyway, your comments and suggestions were greatly appreciated and we are glad you voiced opinions because mum really wanted to know what ya’ll thought. So, I’m excited to inform ya’ll that mum has decided to look at other options like…debarking. No, I’m just pulling your leash. They is going to look into da citronella collars or invest in ear plugs, whichever comes furst. Mum just had way too many concerns about da shock collars to feels comfortable using one. For instance, what to do when her was gone, wasn’t sure bout having a collar on me and not Albert and Whitney, and blah, blah, blah.

I also want to lets you all know that obedience skool is out of da question cuz ummmm…well…I was kicked out of da last three I attended. Da furst trainer said I was a lost cause, da second trainer kept telling me what to do so I bit her, and da last trainer ended up checking into an insane asylum. Sooooo, basically, I am banned from obedience skools in SC. Mum says hers has nevers had a dachshund like me in hers whole life and she is old. Her is like 114 35. Then again, hers has nevers had a female either.

Well anyway, since ya’ll has been so good to me and still my friends (hopefully) I’m gonna show ya’ll mum’s birthday pressie that I picked out fur hers all by myself…it’ not til August though. Just don’t let hers know cuz it’s a surprise, ok.

Nope, it’s not a collar. It is actually a skull splitter that was used in medieval times as a torture device. Do you thinks hers will like it? I think hers will adore it.It should keep her from thinking stoopid things again . Well I must go now, I haves to go talk to da neighbors and find out why da popo was at theirs house yesterday.


Peace Out,

Note from mum: I should mention Puddles has never been kicked out of obedience school. She does know a number of commands. However, when it comes to her barking, she forgets evrything she has learned. With Albert and Whitney they stop with one command and all is good. Where in the world did I go wrong with don't have to answer that. I wonder if she was dropped on her head before we got her.


A MilShelb Mom said...

Yay for you, Puddles!! We are so glad you won't be getting one. Mom was so worried about you!
We didn't get kicked out of obedience school... we dropped out! haha! The lady was mean to Mom and fussed at her in front of the whole class. Maybe we'll do a post about being drop outs sometime. :)
Anyhow, Mom says she's heard girl doxies are harder to train and short-haired ones are not as laid back... so maybe that's the difference. Either way, we are just like you. We bark all the time and not really at anything, but sometimes at stuff. Just depends. Mom just talks back to us in "bark" and sometimes we get quiet because we think she's weird. haha! We do have a weird Mom.
~Milly and Shelby



Aunt Judy uses a little black bag that has something in it, I think its called a bark buster that really works. All she has to do is shake it at one of them and say Baa really load and they stop in their tracts. She never has to shake it at me cause I don't bark much unless I'm chasing a squirrel or taking to the neighbor dogs. I'm sure Aunt wouldn't mind teling you about it if you e-mail her.

Puddles, I bet Aunt Judy could make you a fly swatter holster, she can make anythingt!!


Lola said...

I don't think we were really mad at your Mom, Puddles. Most of us, anyway. We know she's just worried about you and needs for you to comply with whatever the laws are in your town. I just thought that there's a general prejudice against dog barking that doesn't seem to apply to awful machine noises and I don't really get that. I sure hope you work this out soon.

wags, Lola

Frankie Furter said...

Oh Puddles... No One should be mad about the shock collar thingy. We knew your mom wouldn't really do that. I think they were just trying to be funny in their own way.
Now about that birthday pressie for your mom... where DID you get that?? My mom and dad BOTH have birthdays coming (although they don't want that to happen any more)and I would LOVE to get them each one. Trust me... they NEED 'em.
I KNOW your mom is gonna LOVE HERS!!!!
You know something, my VET told my mom that short haired Girl doxies are more "talkative".
Pawsonally I think you are just trying to drive the Nutty Neighbors away. You know the ones I mean, the ones that the popo keep "visiting". Keep up the good work on that, OK???
NOW>>>> about that Pawmise you made to be "good". PLEASE don't change one bit. We love you JUST THE WAY YOU ARE!!

Anonymous said...

Well, I'm glads you got a reprieve (you likes that word? mom taught me it) from the shock collar but my dear darling BFF, you gotta try real hard to work with your momma and not talk ALL the time. 'kay?

And yes, yes! I thinks we ARE related somehows down the line. That's why we get along so super duper great! When we first saw the results, my mom and me laughed and laughed cuz we thought, "oh, won't Puddles be happy about THIS?"

Wiggles & Wags,

houndstooth said...

Poodles, I think you should avoid that present for your mom, just in case someone there should get a crazy idea and decide to use it on you! I'm just sayin'!

I'm glad you made your parents see the light about shock collars!


Minna Krebs said...

Whew! What a relief! I was nervous furs you, and nervous for us (I was afeered that if it worked fur your moms, that my moms might get some crazy idea like that too!!)

Pleeze be carefuls around the neighbor and be kinda quiet. You don't want to makes crazy peoples mad. (But its okays to keep on talking to your moms and dad...they loves you no matter how much you sing and talk!)

((Quiet Hugs)). MinnaK

Madi and Mom said...

Mom I'm 100% sure Puddles is Toto reincarnated!!! Oh my stars that mini doxie could bark. On Saturdays Mom prepares her post for the week. We think tomorrow's Flashback Friday is featuring sure to stop by and you'll see Puddles in male form. As for comparing one animal to another Madi is 360 degrees different from Milky=Way our first cat. You would not believe the difference. We had to move furniture when Madi came to live with us, she got on the Grandfather clock via the stairs and my hubby caught her chewing on she was treading on very serious territory too.

As for your neighbors, since you posted about them I was wondering if you every worry about the pups going in the yard. Do you think that maybe one of the kids next door maybe threw something at her from their yard? Or it could be she is just territorial. We have a border collie next door, 5 years old, since day one that dog has charged the fence every single time I go to feel my bird feeders.
With her it is territorial I'm sure.
Madi and Mom

Anonymous said...

OH! I meant to tells you that yes - the Bull Terrier has naturally Most Magnificent stand-up ears like me! We always wondered where they came from and now I know who to thank!

Wiggles & Wags,

Remington said...

Very good -- NO SHOCK COLLAR! Beth here....Sometimes training with treats works well....when she is barking tell her no and when she stops give her a "little" piece of treat (we wouldn't want to gain much weight) and praise her A LOT! She will get it eventally that when you say no she gets something good. I have trained Remington using the positive training method. All I have to do is say "treat" and he stops whatever he is doing and just looks at me. May work for you....any way it's just a thought.... I am sure most prople will think you are rewarding them for a bad habit but if they stop what they are doing -- that's the end result you want!

Ina in Alaska said...

No way was anyone mad at Puddles Mom. In my opinion it was an open forum to gather info on the pros and cons of the shock collar. Everyone is entitled to their opinions and all were respectful. As it should be. And there were some great alternative ideas. Glad you brought up this topic, Miss Puddles!

We think you have some great gift ideas, where can we get one of those skull crushers to give to our mom in July???


Ruby and Penny said...

Hi Puddles
We're glad you aren't getting a shock collar.
Love Ruby & Penny

DoDo and MoMo said...

We are glad that you wun be shock! ^^;

Maybe we need a hooman version to shock them for treats? Whaya think? ^^v

Sammy and Andy said...

Puddles, Puddles, Puddles, you are definitely one of a kind!!!!!

We are sooooooo happy we met you and became friends.....and you can bark at us any old time. xxxxxxxxxxxx

Anonymous said...

Has your mom ever heard of a vibrating collar? It doenst hurt, it just distracts you from doing what you are doing..They are more humane than the shock collars..Our mommy just sprays us with water or shakes that can filled with rocks and pennies when we bark. It doesnt always work though! hehe

Doxie Mum said...

We have two doxies, one who barks ALL the time (our diva darling Peni) and one who only barks if there is a bunny in the backyard or something (the ever loyal Beau).

I hate to admit it but we have muzzled the barky princess from time to time. All it takes is about 5 minutes in the muzzle and she calms down/ stops barking (well, for a little while at least).

Maggie Mae said...

I missed you Puddles! I am having so much fun getting caught up on your most interesting bloggie posts. Mom said that I will never stay away so long again. You must be happy that you is related to Mayzie too. Does that makes us cuzins in laws?

Woofs and Licks,
Maggie Mae

♥I am Holly♥ said...

Puddles, you always make mom laugh!! You also are the only other dog I know that got kicked out of training school. I wasn't kicked out but my trainer did run off and leave town which actually made mom win a book in a contest for writing the story! No shock collar, yah!!! I talk alot too outside and our neighbors are nutjobs to say the least so mom is always watching me when I go outside cause she doesn't trust what they might do to me. Good stuff Puddles but I don't think your mom wants that for her birthday. Maybe you should come up with something else. Lots of love, Holly and her mom

The Two Country Poodles & Uncle Puppy said...

Whew dodged the shocker....Thank dog! We could never be mad at your mom or you Puddles.

Wags and Licks,
Mollie Jo & Bobo
& Uncle Puppy

Pee Ess: We forgot one thing....Back in the day when I used to chase cars....Momma bought a fog horn....and it was so loud it nearly scard me furless. The vet said its ok as long as the dog isn't within close range. So its perfect for in the yard. Now momma uses a bike horn for my rare occasions of misbehavior like chasing cars (which I haven't done in 4 years) and scratching on the window when someone pulls in my driveway. Good Luck!

Dog Foster Mom said...

Hi Puzzles - you are too funny. Being kicked out of three obedience classes is quite an accomplishment! I don't believe your mom when she says that isn't true - I think she's just embarrassed to admit it. But you should be proud of your accomplishments - not every dog can be so creative and make such a big impression on trainers!

Erika said...

Puddles that is great news! Although maybe a refresher in obedience is needed, so that you will listen to Mom when she tells you what to do.

(Also a water bottle to spray at puddles when she barks might be a worked on my wire fox terrier!)

Junior and Orion said...

We think that "collar" you picked out, or the shock collars should be used on the neighbors. ;)

We are glad the shock collars are not in consideration anymore. We will be purring for you to be able to not talk so much, just cause we don't want any trouble stirred up because of it.

Martha and Bailey said...

Puddles, you are most certainly related to Bailey.
She is also a lost cause. You know when the rescue were rehoming her they said they were looking for a dog loving saint!!!
Thank goodness you and her seem to have found your forever homes!!!
Fortunately Puddles we love a girl with attitude and we just have to look at that face to know you got it girl!
Martha and Bailey xxx

Erin and GuidePupPompei said...

Phew! We didn't even see dat about shock collars, but we're glad you aren't getting one!! Mom says its no reinforcing enough to really work much n-e-how. So. yeps! YOu might just wanna be quiet all by yourself..just a thought!
~Texas and Bubbles

little princess Luna~ said...

hello puddie poo~!
hummmm--my mum and i were not upset are your mum because of the shock collar idea. like we said, sometimes daddi talks about getting one for sid because he barks for EVERYTHING and it gets annoying and we don't want the neighbors to get ticked off at us or hurt him when the pawrents are not around. but yeah....daddi is still debating on it.... :/

mum really wants a mini doxie in the future (ha! over my dead body--mummy is MINE) and she hopes she turns out to be a mischievous little red devil like you. ;)


Asta said...

You awe a cawd, hehehehehe
I love youw dewcwiption of you time at obedience classes(even if you made it all up)hehehe
I think you'we a wondewful oonique , independent giwl and us giwls awe sometimes in need of mowe attention, and of couwse we like to talk. don't tell me youw ancient Mom(mine is two times that ancient almost) doesn't talk talk talk wif hew giwlfwiends..just sayin....
so glad you won't be shocked
smoochie kisses

Khyra, Khousin Merdie, And Sometimes Her Mom said...

Mom is sorry we khan't help -

Sibes are khwiet breeds - when we pass other pups barking their heads off, their humans ask if I bark -

I rarely do - and it is one or two and done -

Khyra & Khousin Merdie
PeeEssWoo: We'll be looking furward to the posts with your mum wearing the pressie!

kissa-bull said...

oh puddles dearest
we misshed youw stowies so much while we were away and we fink the only solution that we can fink of ish to take over oprah's talk show and that way you get paid baziollions of dollars to do what you do best.. . .although . . . maybe a late night comedy talk show would woik out best for you
we're just sayin'
tee hee

pibble sugars and wee wiggles
the pittie pack

Asta said...

I just had to come back Puddles and tell you that I think you awe the most bootifullest giwl and I'm suwe you awe a soopew fashionista, it's just way too hot wight now not to go nekkid, hehehe
smoochie kisses

The Teacher's Pets said...

So happy to hear that you won't be getting on of those shocky things! No one is mad at mommy puddles!

Twix said...

Ok, first of all, Mollie Jo and Bobo's comment has me laughing my tail off! I can't even imagine their mom out in the front yard blasting the fog horn...hahahahahaha!
BEFORE my mom met my dad, she used to spritz me with a water bottle and it got to the point that all she had to do was pick it up and I stopped barking. That is how much I hate water! Anyway, Daddy sent all her training down the tubes and I am so very glad!!!!

♥♥♥ The OP Pack ♥♥♥ said...

Puddles, we know your Mom would only do what is best for her sweet baby - that's you, you know:) We sure hope you can learn to stop talking so much. Mom says she had an old nun when she was in first grade who used to threaten the yakkety yak kids with a little brown bottle and a dropper - she said it was poison - can you believe that???

Woos - Phantom, Thunder, and Ciara

Lorenza said...

Hi, Puddles!
What a relief! I am sure your Mom will find the perfect solution for you!
I don't bark a lot. Only when someone speaks in a very loud voice and that makes me go in a barking mode!
I am not so sure you mom will love your present! I hope you find something... softer!
Kisses and hugs

Zona said...

Hmm.. I guess I missed some excitement yesterday here on your bloggie! With the two-leggers away I'm super busy babysitting. My mom thought about the dreaded collar once before... she was at the bottom of her bag of training tricks and SCARED because Phoenix was very much into chasing cars when she first came to live with us. Yipes! She lucked out though and it sounds like you did too! For what it's worth, I believe your opening picture. :: wink wink :: Try to be a good girl - moms worry, ya know?


road-dog-tales said...

Puddles - glad you won't be getting the collar! A few of us like to talk a little more than Mom & Dad would like, but that's the way the doggy cookie crumbles. What we want to know is why it's okay for people (especially really young people) to make all the noise they want and no one threatens to put a bark collar on them! Hmmmm???
The Road Dogs

JD and Max said...

Hi - thanks for your comment about where we are! We think we might have to invest in new staff - sigh! Our FH doesn't post for us as often as we'd like - and by the end of the week we're usually falling behind on commenting on our blog pals posts, but we usually try to ccatch up on the weekend!

We left a comment on your previous post about our experience with a citronella collar - it's been a huge boon for getting Max used to children, we wouldn't be without it!

Schnauzer snuggles - JD and Max.

Jan's Funny Farm said...

We're glad debarking and shock collars are off the "cure" list.

Anonymous said...

Remote Shock Collars are one of the most effective, easiest and most humane training aids available. Remote Shock Collars are placed on a dog's neck, allowing a trainer to deliver small static corrections of varying strength by remote control. The correction the dog gets from the remote dog training collar is no different than static from walking on carpet. The benefits of working with a remote dog training collar is the trainer can immediately correct a dog's mistakes at a distance far greater than leash training allows. A Shock Collar is a safe, effective and humane way to train your dog.