Wednesday, January 25, 2012

Mangominster


While I was convalescing afters my near death experience, I decided to works on my Mangominster entry. But, I was forced withs a dilemma....

So I says to myself, "Nows Gorgeous, what ever category is you gonna enter since you has so many endearing qualities and so well rounded furs each one?"
It was a tuff decision to make but afters I thoughts long and hard...and thought some mores... and did more thinkin' and eventually had a headache...I finally decided.

Nows I knows ya'll all thoughts I would prolly enters da Too Darn Cute category...

But I ain't.
Cuz ya'll sees, there is mores to me than just a purty face.
(no, really there is)
Aaaaaand since I do be so modest...bwhahahaha...ahem, anyways,
 I decided to get back to my doxie roots and goes withs da...

WORKIN' STIFFS!

I ain't your average workin' dog by no means.
See, I be a dachshund and dat makes me a HUNTER HUNTRESS.
And a freakin' awesome hunter I might add (givin' myself a pat on da back)
I was bred to do dis kinda work...okays, my ancestors were but it is still ingrained in me.

But you must remembers dat I only hunt furs da shear fun and thrill to protect my peeps and territory.

Sooooo, let's get on withs da show shall we?

Intruders has been known to infiltrate da Puddles Perimeter.
Come heres Squirrely, I has treat furs you.

But don't think I just sit and stare...I take my job seriously.

Take Mr. Groundhog furs example...
I was wounded in da battle and has a humongus skar nows.
Dats why they calls me "Skar Neck"...
 ...ummmm, okays so I made dat part up.

Once again, I was put to test with anudder intruder....Mr. Chipmunk
And yea, sometimes I do gets blood and guts on me but it's only fur protecting da ones I loves.

You can also add a squirrel, 2 rats, a mole, and a fly to da resume.

Sometimes I EVEN has to go where no dog dares to go...
... way down in deep, dark caves wheres da boogeyman lives.
But I ain't skeered, I is fierce.

One can nevers be sure what is in da yard so I also has to takes da proper precautions NO matter WHAT it may be.
Squirrels has been known to be cloned as pillows.
.
Nows da safety of my peeps ain't limited to da yard.
Sometimes I has to be on da look out in da house to, you nevers know what dangers lurk theres.
You may needs to view da next foto at your own risk
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Unfortunately, I hads to take Barbie down too.
Hers was up to no good.


I has also been to sacrifice myself and gets bit by a tarantula just to keeps my peeps safe from harm.
My eyeball was practically hangin' outta my head ya'll.

I  also has to protect da environment sometimes too.
"Okays, I gots all da recyclables out, your welcome mudder earth".

Bein' a Worker dog, I also must protect mum when hers goes outside so hers don't fall.
Ya'll knows how graceful hers can be...NOT!
So it is my duty to clean up da pee-cans so hers don't go splat and has da 'hood laughin' at hers.

My workin' ain't just limited to fun and games eithers.
Sometimes I has to help my girl withs her school projects.
It's a tuff job but somebuddy has to do it cuz I be da only one qualified.


I is one proud doxie to serve and to protect...and still be hawt doin' it.
Okays I is done...dis be gettin' too long and I has WORK to do.

Puddles


62 comments:

Ronnii, Uji & Izzy ( & Momma Tea ) said...

OMD Miss Puddles mee neva knewed yoo works so hart n Kudos fur da killin ovs evil critters, mi Moomi n mee for yor eye looked most uncomfy yoo is sooooo brave. Yoo shood wins fur sure mee finks

Lov
Izzy
xxxx

houndstooth said...

Ha ha ha! Oh Puddles, I'm surprised you didn't have "Working For A Living" or "She Works Hard For The Money" playing today! You also left out how you almost got hired as a police dog.

I am impressed, though, because I hadn't realized just how long your resume really is!

Bunny

Corbin said...

I'm in awe of all the work you have done for your family! And to think, you don't even get paid! Great job, Puddles. I'm so happy I'm not in the contest against you!
-Corbin

~Shelle said...

Geez... all my dachshunds do it try and find the way to turn on their personal space heater names Jean Claude. You definitely have the warrior huntress DNA in you!

Sugar the Golden Retriever said...

Woof! Woof! I am thinking to take part on the cute category ... you sure got a long DETAILED list. Lots of Golden Woofs, Sugar

Bassetmomma said...

Oh my goodness Puddles! You are fearless! You've got some real battle scars there. I guess you are a working stiff! Good luck on your entry!

Frankie Furter and Ernie said...

YaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaWn STRETCH Yaaaawn

I am WORN OUT just readin all that you do. I gotta go snag a nap.

GOOSE said...

Puddles! You are my kind of girl. I would love to go to work with you. I have not taken down a rat but I have taken down a few skunks. Maybe after we finish workin' a guy could intrest you in a beer and some cheetos.
I'd vote for you for sure.
Blessings,
Goose

Frankie Furter and Ernie said...

OKAY.... I'm back. Whew!! Girrrrl you have soooooo many jobs that you do and Do SOOOOOO WELL.
You are FUR SURE a Workin Stiff. Your FURS are even STIFF with Blud and Guts. You are gonna take the Workin Stiffs Category fur SURE.
You are ONE BRAVE and HARD WORKER if EVER there was one.

YaaaaaaWn Yawwwwn.. I need another nap. Darn girrrl YOU are GOOOOD

Minna Krebs said...

Bwahahahaha.......... I forgots about poor Barbie and da pillows.....I think you could qualify as a Cracker Dog too!!

Bwahahahaha!

Amber DaWeenie said...

Oh Puddles you do work so hard to protect every buddy. Butt....face it girlfurend...You is a accident jus waitin to happen! Maybe you better tell Mom to start workin so her can pay all your hospital bills. Just sayin!

BOL BOL BOL

Minna Krebs said...

Fur some reason, my momma can hardly get past that foto of you in your bonnet! Ever time she reads your post, her scrolls back up to look at the foto, and starts cracking ups laughing all over again!?!

Cole said...

Puddles, you are sure to win! That is quite the entry into your desired category!

Two French Bulldogs said...

Oh Puddles that is hilarious. You are a very hard worker
Benny & Lily

Minna Krebs said...

Lucy here.......I'm putting together my DJ playlist for the Valentine Party. I can't seem to locate that spaghetti song on iTunes. Any ideas?

The Heartbeats said...

There ARE always dead skirrels in front of your house Puddles. You must work hard!

Wiggles,
Calhoun

rottrover said...

Brains, beauty and brawn...and blood! You're our hero, Puddles!

-Bart and Ruby

Helen P. said...

You are so fierce! Certainly a good dog to have around when anything vicious approaches. They won't take you seriously, but I will!

Madi and Mom said...

MOL Puddles
Mom and I knew all along there was a very intelligent, hard working, Doxie behind that pretty (blood stained) face!! I think you are hands down winner for the most versatile hardworking lady Doxie on the planet.

We especially got a big chuckle out of taking Barbie down. Mom told me Toto, the Mighty Mini Doxie who owned my peeps, was a 'leg man'. He always chewed on my sis's Barbie's legs. One time she found him in the act and chased him all around the house with victim trying to swat him with the victims long flowing hair. Mom saw him coming and opened the back door for him to escape. Toto 1-Sis-0
Hugs from your BFFF,
madi

The Websters said...

Puddles, you are SO BRAVE! Maybe we can go on a hunt sometime?

I'm glad you're a little smarter now today too. We love your comments so much. They always make us giggle!

Lots of love,

Nora

Brian said...

Work, work, work, that's all you ever do Puddles!

Tucker said...

you are a workaholic - time for a nap!

woof - Tucker

Tank said...

blood, guts, detached eyeball, beheaded barbie... wow

you got game P

mayziegal said...

WHOA! THAT is a LOT of hard work! Does your mom do ANYthing arounds the house or do you have to do it all? I thinks you need to ask for a raise. Two kegs a week instead of one.

Good luck in MM, my hard-workin' furend!

Wiggles & Wags,
Mayzie

Remington said...

WOWZERS! You are quite the protector, my friend!

KB said...

I had no idea that your mom worked you so very hard. Obviously, you've stepped up to the jobs!

How did you get into the trash can? That's the part that's bugging me! Could you teach our dogs how to sort the recycling like you do?

I'd say that your work wounds are very impressive and should earn you many sympathy points with the judges. They did with me...

Frankie Furter and Ernie said...

OK... I'm awake NOW!!! Sheeesh

I think you should be PAID fur all that you do. Like One Beer and a bag of Cheetos fur EVERY TASK.

Peggy Frezon said...

Wow you do a lot of work, but I think you need to wear some sort of protective gear, I don't like to see you getting hurt and covered in blood and all that. Good luck in that mongo contest!

Jan's Funny Farm said...

You got bit by a tarantula? Ouch!

You are one hard worker, Miss Puddles. Good luck with your entry.

harrispen said...

Oh my goodness, the competition just got real stiff for my Nina in that category! Nina is a mighty huntress too. I forgot to put that on her Mango Minster resume. She has taken down 3 rabbits and a tree-rat in her younger days. The tree-rat encounter even left her with a scar too. May the best dog win.

Cindy

Brandon - The dog with a blog said...

OMD, you have been soo furry busy!!

Mango said...

Most impressive. Who knew you were more than just a pretty face? I am most intrigued by your rodent hunting and consuming skills. One time Mr. Owl dropped Mr. Rabbit in our yard but momma scooped it up and put it in the poop pile. However, I know there are more out there. I wish you would write a manual on raw dieting. Hehehe. I just usually eat their poops.

Slobbers,
Mango

Jess and Glacier said...

Oh, my, Puddles. You are definitely a working stiff...you may have Glacier beat. :)

Junior, Orion and Sammy said...

With all that work you do Puddles, we have no idea how you have time to eat or rest!

jen said...

LOL! I am going to be honest here Puddles, I thought for sure you would of been entered into the Bad Sports catagory, but this works too!!

animal lover, quilt lover said...

Miss Puddles you do the best posts!!!
If there was a contest for best post, you would win hands down!!!
You work hard for your treats, don't there!!!!
xx, Fern

Nola said...

You'll do great! Good luck!
Dachshund Noal

Gloria Hood said...

WOW! You are one busy little lady! Guess I got a lot to learn yet huh?
Lovies, Miss Mindy

Maggie and Mitch said...

You're the hardest working girlie we know, Puddles! Gosh, you have battle scars everywhere!

Love ya lots
Maggie and Mitch

Mr. Pip said...

Bawhahahaha! I hardly know where to start, but while I think about it how about handing over that pillow so I can take a rest - that is, once you make sure it is safe for my yorkie butt to take a rest ...

Now, I am not what you would call a "working dog", but remember I once killed an ant! Does that count?

Your pal, Pip

Mr. Pip said...

P.S.: You mean you crawled in that garbage can all by yourself? No stool? No ramp? That's the stuff dreams are made of - my peeps throw out all kinds of yummy leftovers.

ABBY said...

Puddles
You win paws down!
purrs
>^,,^<
♥Abby♥Boo♥Ping♥Jinx♥Grace♥

A MilShelb Mom said...

Oh!! We LOVED this post! Even showed it off to our Dad. We were all like look how cool our furiend Puddles is and he was all like don't go gettin' any idears. UGH.
~Milly and Shelby

Shawnee the Shepherd said...

Who knew? The burning kwestshun do be just when duss you has time fur drinking beer and eating pee-cans? Oh, and you furgot the worm in the pee-can that you horked around. You showed him you mean bizziness, didn't you? Dang gurl, you has a hard job.

♥♥♥ The OP Pack ♥♥♥ said...

Puddles, we are just exhausted reading about how hard you work. Great category choice for you. And we must add that we do hope you are paid well for your services with weekly bonuses.

Woos - Phantom, Thunder, Ciara, and Lightning

Bobbi said...

Oh dear Puddles... you are so funny!! That headless Barbie brought back memories, only Gracie chewed off School Teacher Barbie's hand instead of her head... and we all know that school teachers need to be able to write on the blackboard.
You are a dog of many talents Miss Puddles! You are rough and tough and just as cute as can be. I love your pictures!

Maggie Mae said...

My Dear Puddles,

You are a winner to me in any category!

Yours,
Max

Alfie said...

wow Puddles, you have gone through a lot! But that's what it takes to me an amazing hunter! I wish I had your skill ;) I also wish I had all the fury creatures you get in your yard (luckies!) Being a doxie sounds like PUDDLES of fun!

Wyatt said...

Puddles,
You are a fierce competitor...really fierce! Who knew? Those pesky vermin don't stand a chance on your turf!

Wyatt and Stanzie

chicamom85 said...

Puddles you are amazing!!! Holy dog, I was glued to the screen. I can't believe all the battle scars and the stories you must have. You should totally write a book. You are a hard worker for sure.

licks and sniffs Sasha

Jazzi said...

WOW Puddles!! You are one hard working dog!! I think you should win paws down!!!

wags
Jazzi and Addy

Declan said...

Stop the competition now; you've obviously won.. Uncle Flynn was once bitten on the toe by an Anaconda..or so he used to say...hmmm... Deccy x

Jbenz said...

That's quite the resume, Mz Puddles! keep up the good (and Hard) work!
I'm gonna stay home and relax now that I know you'll be working hard enough for the both of us ;)
<3
JBenz

♥Mona + Weenie + Mommy, too♥ said...

Oh Puddles, if we ever go to war, I wanna be on your side. You are skilled girl.

Mommy needed a good laugh and you just gave it to her. Her be very sad today.

{{{huggies}}}....Mona

Pibble said...

Are you pulling all 20 of our legs, 22 if we count the 2-legger? Do you really fight squirrels and groundhogs? AND BARBIE?! You'd better watch out for Barbie, she's got those high heels and friends with kung fu grips. I'm afraid you'll get more battle skars!

STELLA and RORY from Down Under said...

Howdy Miss Puddles, wowza you are certainly a working girl. Keeping all those rodents away, protecting your family and suffering all those injuries, especially the eyeball one eewwww. Good luck with the competition. No worries, and love, Stella and Rory

Jed and Abby in MerryLand said...

We're pushovers for a Wounded Warrior. We shudder to think of the peril the Barbie must have posed, perhaps to the intellectual development of your Girl? Now that is a serious threat and we commend your recognizing it. [Pretty soon she'll be old enough for American Girl dolls; don't chew those up. Way too expensive, and at least the original intent of the AG line was much superior.] We've always thought you a hard working doxie, Miss Puddles. We wish you the best of luck in the competition.

Jed & Abby

Zona said...

Okay, dis comment is not related to your postie at all... but... I LOVE the pic of you and your girl in the sidebar. ADORABLE! My mom thinks she has a resemblance to Kelly Ripa but even MORE beautiful. (I know... I gots to get her away from the TV more often.....)

Wags,
Zona

What Remains Now said...

Perfect pick. I feel sorry for all the other contestants. You've got quite alot of material supporting why you should win.

ArtemisiaFSS said...

Your hunting skills are pawsome.

Bigdogzola said...

Hello Miss Puddles..Nice to visit you..wowee for such a Shortie..oops..I mean petite lady..you have some multi-talented skill sets going on...and such bravery that even a big Ridgeback like me would be proud of. Battling against chipmonks and tarantulas..as well as the recycling bin and Cindy doll..eek! You really are amazing and all above and beyond the call of duty..in fact I hope my human doesn't get any ideas. Anyway I am not happy that she has embarassed me by my entry in the Bad Sports..HUMPF! Greetings from France..very impressed Dachsie! Zola

2browndawgs said...

You have a hazardous job at times! Good luck to you!