Wednesday, November 13, 2013

A Day of Mourning

Furiends, da day befores yesterday...which was Monday...
I was in a state of mournin'.
It was one of da worstest days evers and I is includin' all my 
allergic reactions..it was a terrible day fur me.

It all started withs me tryin' to takes a nap.
(why do my naps always gets interrupted?)
But I heards all dis commotion outside.
And OMD was I evers shocked at what I seened.
Out my mum and dad's bedroom window I seened DIS....
  A MAN!!!!!!!
"What da hell he be doin'?" I thoughted to myself

And then briefly laters...DIS!
He was all up in my Pee-can tree!

So bouts a gazillian hours laters they lefted my yard and I finally
was ables to go check out my yard to sees what he was doin'.

"NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!"

I screamed likes I has nevers screamed befores.
Believes me, da whole entire 'hood hearded my screams.

Dis is what I seened.

and dis...

I started cryin' uncontrollably.
HE CUT DOWN MY PEE-CAN TREE!!!!!!!!!!


"WTF Mum?"

I began to reminsce of all da cherished memories of my pee-can tree.
There was da time I planted beer theres, da time Mini me ran into da bank, 
all my hours of diggin' fun, and last but not least...all my pee-can I ated and 
my awesome pee-can pies.
Through time, I learned hows to eat 'em whole...sometimes even withs a worm in 'em.
Ooooooh such wonderful memories.

I just coulldn't takes it anymores, I telled mum I wanted to go in da house.
I was still cryin' and asked hers....
"WHY woman would you has them cut my tree down?"
Hers response was stoopid..."Because it was in bad condition and it could have fallen on the house."
See...stoopid...we has insurance.

Befores I go I must leave you withs a photo of me eatin' pee-cans.

Nows Mr. Pee-can Theivin' man came back da next day so there be
twice as much brush in da yard and he not even done da actual tree yet.

And to make matters worser, ht had to take my fence down so nows I has to
go poop and pee on a leash in da FRONT YARD fur da whole world to see.

Puddles

45 comments:

My Mind's Eye said...

MOL MOL MOL PUDDLES I DON'T MEAN TO LAUGH GIRLFRIEND BUT DANG YOU MAKE A TRAGEDY HILARIOUS.
Ok now I'm finished MOLing my head off and I have to say Bless your heart.You are Queen of the house and in charge how did this happen w/o your approval. Demerits are in order....Oh an the shame having to pee in the front on attached to a string with everyone looking....disgraceful
Get up here girl we have room
Hugs Madi your bfff

Pippen said...

What's wrong with doing your businesses in the front yard for everyone to see? We do it all the time and actually prefer it to the backyard!

Sam and Pippen

PeeS. So sorry about the peecan tree, it's always sad to lose a tree but a good idea to cut them down before they fall on the house.

Unknown said...

Disgusting Puddles. Absolutely damn awful. We feel your pain. What next we ask? It is a monumental tragedy. Oh and worse you have to pee in the front yard? Call the Po Po you have tree stealers.
Have a wonderful woeful Wednesday.
Best wishes Molly
RIP Pee-can tree!

booahboo said...

how is a lady gonna poopee in them front yard with the whole world looking at HER? ask your mama HOW! you is a lady.. and a lady can't poopee in front for everyone to sees.. urmm... peecans or not.. trees that get too huge can be a huge danger to houses. mebbe u shud collect some peecans and start growing some smaller peecans trees...

Marg said...

Oh no Puddles. That is just horrible news.We understand why you are in mourning. Bye Bye Pecan tree. Puddles tell those men to get that fence back up pronto. Hope your week gets better. Take care.

GOOSE said...

NO NO NO NO NO!!! How could this happen? I will morn with you. I morn as I look at your beautiful self in a photo on my entertainment center and sitting in front of that photo of you is a stick from your pecan tree. The very stick you sent me. It's a little wet right now as my tears are falling on it. I am to sad to say anything more.
Blessings,
Goose

Bella Roxy & Macdui said...

OMD, Puddles!!!!

Not the pee-can tree! What, did the kerazy lady get really mad when you threw up that last pee-can? We can't believe it! Maybe you'd better ask Santa Paws for another one and plant it further away from the house.

XXXOOO Daisy, Bella & Roxy who are still in prison.

Millie and Walter said...

We are so sorry to hear of your loss Miss Puddles. We like the ideas of planting a new one.

Millie & Walter

Linda said...

Somebody needs to call the Tree Police. How did this happen without your approval? No more Pecans the injustice of it all.
I feel your pain Puddles I don't pee in the front yard either aint nobodies gonna watch me doin my business out there.

xo Cinnamon

Frankie Furter and Ernie said...

AIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEEEEeeee

WHAT the HECK??? THIS is just OVER THE TOP... We think your mum has gone TOOOOOOOOOO far this time.

Furst she brings that DARK Tree into your HOUSE and THEN she Cuts DOWN your PEE Can Tree. WELL, WE think you should just start POOPin under the DARK TREE!!
We think your mum needs
some major TREEtment.

BUTT WAIT.... Now you will have LOTS of SPACE fur Planting MilkBone TREES... They would grow GRRRREAT in your ZONE... (we think it is the TWILIGHT Zone) and would no doubt have milkbones to harvest YEAR Around! You can get the seeds from the Burp Ease CATaLog.

stellaroselong said...

WE are crying right along side of you PUDDLES cos we all realize we have absolutely no control over our own lives or pecan trees in your case. I finks our parents make choices that they never fink will affect our lives then later they realize they made a big mistake and can't fix it. We will be sending you a card real soon, i am sure hallmark makes one for a time like this in your lif. Wesa are real sorry.
Stella Rose, Maggie and Gussie

genji said...

The indignity. First your Pee-Can tree, and now doing your business on leash? I hopes they planted a new tree for you. And gave you lots of treats to smother your sorrows in.

Scooter said...

Oh NO Puddles, not the pee-can tree!!! WHy do peeps always want to be a kill-joy and take away the good stuffs?? COUldnt they just have trimmed it a bit and left you your tree?? We all feel for you Puddles!!

wags
JAzzi and Addi

What Remains Now said...

That's what insurance is for!! So you can have pee-can trees, even ones in bad shape, and not worry. We are so sad, Puddles. Now what!?!

Ziggy Stardust said...

Puddles, the horrors you have suffered this day will not be forgotten. I cannot believe they did this without even consulting you. WTF is going on over there??? Now I have no more peecan pies to look forward to. How will you get along without biting on your peecans and them coming in and barfing them up?? Your whole world is upside down. Try to keep calm, I think a beer and some cheetos are a good start. I will be over as soon as I can to help you. For now, can you stash some of those peecans for us for later?? I want to bite into a few myself. Do they taste good coming up??

Take care Puddles and hang in there, think of the revenge you can wreak on the Kerazy Lady now.

Loveys Sasha

Mollie said...

Puddles you iz such a drama Queen Bawahwhhahahahaa so pick anuffer Pee-can tree..BOL A birdy told uz youz Pooped in de drive in front of all de neighbor'z Bwahwhahahahaha xxooxxxx

Mollie and Alfie

ANGEL ABBYGRACE said...

Puddles we know Change is hard. Maybe you can plant a new peecan tree?

Jans Funny Farm said...

Oh, such drama and trauma. We're sorry you lost your pecan tree but mostly we're sorry you have to pee and poop in public now. How embarrassing!

houndstooth said...

NOOOOOOOOO! Tell me you at least saved one pecan! If you did, you can go out after he's gone and plant another pecan tree. I can't believe the injustice of this. I'm sure that you will have your revenge, though! You do have a plan, don't you?

Bunny

Idaho PugRanch said...

That is just not right, tear down your peecan tree and have expose yur self to the world when poopin and peein! Just not right!
So sorry Puddles

Mr Bailey, Hazel & Greta

The Websters said...

WORST DAY EVER!

Probably the worst week. YOu must DEMAND they leave the brush. Do you know what brush means? VERMIN. Plenty of hunting. If you have brush, you may not even remember the ol' peecan tree because you'll be so so busy killing things. Vermin are even better than peecans.

I know you know this because you are as mighty a huntress as I.

Nora

Matilda the Boxer said...

OMD, I can't believe they would do that to you!!!

Sketching with Dogs said...

Oh my Dog, the inhumanity! Is this the thanks you get for being a faithful and loyal diva? Your precious tree cut down just because it was going to smash the house to pieces? They will come up with any flimsy excuse to spoil our fun, pfftt!
Dip Bridge and Elliot x
pee ess, Mum has seen the Walking Dead, 9/10 for gore :)

JacksDad said...

We got morning every morning. You'd better send someone to check on that picture that has fallen down in front of your window!! :)

da tabbies o trout towne said...

puddles N whatz even werster is de pee can tree wuz BURD FREE...due ewe noe how hard it iz ta get good burd free treez any mor...ya mite knot noe but we iz tellin ya....oh whoa, we iz cryin two....noe tree, noe piez N now stooooooooopid azz burdz will be bye N roostin in de tree next ta de pee can tree causin 18 kindz oh hell....eggs cuze pleez while we weepzzz

Yamini MacLean said...

Hari Om
Crikey Pudds, you can be heard screaming all over Blogville never mind the 'hood!! With some justification I feel, though to be honest, having had a tree come down on my roof and having to use insurance was still NOT fun. So perhaps the kerazy one is wiser than you give credit for. I bet there is some compensation coming somewhere... somewhen...
Hugs and wags from will have to do for now. YAM-aunty xxx

Murphy said...

That is so sad. We hate to hear about a tree dying and a pee-can tree would be more sad! How are you gonna make a pee-can pie?

Your pals,

Murphy & Stanley

Brian's Home Blog said...

Dang, that is sad Puddles. I better keep an eye on my Pee-can tree!

Inger said...

Me: Poor Puddles, this is soooo SAD!

Samson Says: Too bad you are so short, or you could do a counter swipe in revenge. I used to swipe bananas, avocados, and stuff before they put it up too high for me to reach.

Anonymous said...

Oh No, poopin and peein in front of the whole world thats not right. But as for the pee can tree, you know Mom can go and buy those for you. Bet she didn't tell you that!

The Mad Scots

Scooter said...

Wow, this is horrible! How come it is the peeps never ask our permission before they do something bone-head like this! OMD, now da karazy lady is gonna have to go to the store and buy pecans for you...she'll be sorry!
Grr and Woof,
Sarge, Pol Comm

KB said...

Puddles - you tell da woman dat you da boss, and she must ask you before doing something so insane. She is kerazy.

Dachshund Nola said...

OMD THE HORROR!
Nola

Rubie and Poots (her Mum) said...

Your peeps must have rocks in their head. Cuttin' down a pawfectly good pee-can tree. Wish I had one. I didn't know you is shy about doing 1's and 2's in the front yard?!

Tail Wuggles, Rubie xxx

Two French Bulldogs said...

He better get out off your tree. We thought you were a pee can
Lily

♥♥ The OP Pack ♥♥ said...

The horror of it, Puddles. We sure do hope your Mom and Dad have plans to plant a new pecan tree for you. But you know, you probably really didn't want to have it fall on your house - just think about how crazy your Mom would make you with all her redecorating:)

Woos - Phantom, Ciara, and Lightning

Taffy said...

Oh no! What am I gonna do with out seeing my furiend eating pee-cans? Those are some of my favorite photos of you. Doesn't your mom know she just took away your joy? Shame on her!!!!

Wyatt said...

Puddles-
Ooooo no...you should have run out there and started hugging the tree or chained your bad self to it. That's what we do here in Oregon...hee hee

Wyatt

Molly the Airedale said...

What a bummer that your pecan tree had to go, Puddles. We are truly sorry. Does this mean no pecan pie for Thanksgiving?!

Love ya lots♥
Mitch and Molly

Katie http://myminipetpig.com/ said...

Oh man, Puddles! What WAS all that commotion?! That poor pee-can tree, we can't believe it!

Unknown said...

What.The.Dog? Puddles, this is unacceptable! Your Pee-can tree cut down by some man? For no reason? I just cannot believe it. I am in shock.

Lucy-Fur, as typed by Dr. Liz said...

Oh no!!! What is with these humans and this 'it will fall down if we don't cut it down' thinking? If it falls down, they have the perfect excuse to do some remodeling. *sheesh*

*kissey face*
-Fiona and Abby the Hippobottomus

Bobbie said...

Oh Puddles. Life is not good for you right now. I don't know how you can go on! And no more Pee Cans?? Of course, you showed them! You sure Can Pee. For all the world to see.

Dexter said...

How thoughtless of your humans to allow that guy to hack the pecan tree to death. Not to mention the indignity of having to do your business out front where everybody can see. When will the insanity end?

Kisses,
Dexter

Sweet William The Scot said...

Puddle Duddles your life is so traumatic! Why why would he take down your peecan tree, why he killed a defenceless tree, that is just not right. How are you going to make it without peecans?
Sweet William The Scot